Tuesday 20 May 2014

Post Pregnancy- My Body/My Child

Source: http://siklusair.com/pregnant-with-7-babies-keepingkidssafenow




There are many things about pregnancy that people talk about (the birthing experience, the pregnancy glow, the baby etc), but there is one thing that persons might not elaborate so much about and that is the post pregnancy body. Now I have to share something because my pregnancy caused some transformations in my body that I did not mentally prepare for. For one thing, I was so excited, body and looks were the last thing on my mind. Secondly, I really did not think it would happen to me. It was my first child and my skin seems really good. Most of all though, I really thought that after the baby, with a few exercises and dieting, I will get right back to where I was. After all, I looked at some my friends, spoke to a few people and it is like they didn't even have a child. I mean after a few months, they went back to their original state. So believe me when I say I got a surprise of a lifetime and it put me in a state of mind, where I constantly have to speak positive things to myself. Let me tell you my story....

As soon as I found out that I got a confirmed pregnancy from the doctor, I purchased my olive oil and shea butter and I started to grease/oil down like a pig. I remembered a friend of mine told me that her mother-in-law said that  this was what she did throughout her pregnancy and she did not see one stretch mark. Well in spite of all the oil, I oil down, when I entered the latter part of my second trimester, I started to see some tiny lines. I thought to myself, that was nothing. By then, my nose had already gone up a size, my skin was probably 2 shades darker (it went up) and pimples had taken over much of my neck, chest and back. I was not worried or did I care. I was pregnant. I remembered saying to my husband, it did not matter what this child did to my body, We are having a baby! So when I weighed the last time and realized I was over 200lbs, it did not bother me. I hate seeing unnecessary fat and so I knew I'd get it off (or so I thought). When my feet became swollen and I remembered a teacher friend said to me a few years  back, expect your foot size to go up one foot after a baby, it still did not bother me. My feet were  small (7/7 1/2) so what was one size up. Then I had the baby and time began to pass, but the impact of the pregnancy was still upon me.

I began feeling depress. I felt ugly and unattractive. The weight gained went down drastically with breastfeeding, except in the tummy (where it matters most). The fat there is sooo stubborn. As I did a c-section, I could not "tie down" within 3 months or start any exercise until I was granted permission from the doctor. Still, even when I was given the go ahead to exercise, my schedule was so busy with the new born that I could not fit it in. When I lie on my back, my belly skin shake like jello. After months of stretching, there was excess, stretched marked skin. Then there was the navel. For 'umteen' years, ever since I know myself, I had an inverted navel. I loved it. It was what we referred to as sexy navel....the type fit for a bikini. Well my bikini days have ended, over, done. So I revisited my doctor. I wanted to know how soon after a baby, your navel went back in ( it was already passed 3 months for me). I found out that normally it goes back in almost immediately, and that I had a hernia. I was told I need to do a minor surgery  to repair the hernia (I was tired of surgeries...I had one for the fibroid, one for the baby and now needed one for the hernia). I said to myself I'll wait a little and I am still waiting, but I found out that an inverted navel does not just look good when exposed, it also presents certain benefits when covered, like not poking out of your skin-fit dress or shirt. So I really do miss my navel.

It really is not easy. However, each day I gained strength by looking at my daughter. Every time, I would asked myself, would you have preferred a sexy body over your child, which I know with all my heart, the answer to is no! With that, I would smile. It does not changed the fact though that many of us women are struggling with our post pregnancy body. Some of us have even been driven into post pregnancy depression because of an inability to come to grips with and rise above our physical image. Recently, I looked at a video about post pregnancy bodies and I know that as women we need to support each other. Here is the link that I think will make you feel a bit more comfortable with yourself... http://www.upworthy.com/this-photograph-sparked-mothers-to-show-us-what-their-post-baby-bodies-really-look-like?c=ufb1

Now I am still a work in progress and as soon as I can schedule my time effectively, I intend to get cracking with some directives to achieving an acceptable body image for myself. It might not be sexy according to the media or would it be my original state, but I would be able to look down at me and say Yesss! I did it!


3 comments:

  1. sigh just read this , you will be fine and most importantly you have a healthy daughter.

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  2. Hey Hun, I can totally understand and relate to what you are saying. For me, I hate when people say your baby is healthy so that's what's important, because after all it not about the child, it's about your own personal issues that you are struggling with. Of course you are over the moon about your child, but because you are human you will feel some type of negative feeling about your body. My advise is just focus on your own personal issues and work on them and the ones that are here to stay, well get friendly with them :). We are all built differently, hence the reason why some people bounce back faster than some. Also, some people don't breast feed their children and so their hormones are able to get back to normal faster than the ones that breast feed. As regard to your body if you are still breast feed and flowing like crazy you will still look fatty :) but that's because the milk you are producing has to store some where. My youngest is 17 months and is still breast feeding (that's the only milk he will drink) and my body looks totally different when my eldest was his age ( because he stop breast feeding at 9 months) this thing the nurses and doctors say about breast feeding will help you lose the weight is a big fat lie.

    I dont have any stretch mark and so does my mom and she birth five (could be hereditary) but then again I know people whose mother dont have any but yet they have. I think it's just base on your genes. I do, however, have the double belly because of C-section (but that can be toned up later). A lot of people feel pressure now to bounce back faster because we see all the celebrities looking so great after couple of months but the differences is we dont have the money or time. They can to hire personal trainers, nannies and nutritionist and all everything under the sun. People have all kind of theories about why certain changes happen but the truth of the matter is we are all different individuals and so are the children we bring in this world. I have two boys and I had two totally different experience with them in terms of pregnancy, birth and my body image but some will swear that a boy's experiences is different than a girl's but for me I can only speak on my experiences.

    Best wishes on your journey to finding that sexy body you want. PS your daughter is a cutie

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    Replies
    1. Thanks for sharing Sally. You are so on point with everything. We do not know what will or will not happen with our bodies and our experiences may differ, but at the end of the road we still have much to be thankful for.

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